"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Alive.
So much puke
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
