Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
handjob tips. give me some.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
