is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
