Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Randomize