When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
