It's Friday. Sex?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
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