So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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