...so i touched it.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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