I CAN MOONWALK!
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
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