so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
