i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Drunk is not a location!
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize