and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
