She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize