your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize