Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize