discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
