But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
this just has baby written all over it
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
