I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
