And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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