just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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