Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize