Just cropdusted the office
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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