She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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