yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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