I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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