Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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