I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
