I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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