i jhust puked up my retainher.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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