I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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