i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize