New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
