Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
so much tequila, so little girl.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
