How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
