My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
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