yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize