38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
