Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
