I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
