i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
