Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
