I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
