Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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