We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
