So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I wish life had little blips of pornography
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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