as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
