before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
