I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
