i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
