I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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