I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
